“I used to think God’s grace had limits—especially when my lifelong dream collapsed.
“I started playing basketball at the age of 11, and by early high school, I was convinced the sport would be my career path. I played on a travel team that took so much time, it felt like I was working a full-time job at 14.
“While I trusted in Christ early in my life, throughout high school, I misunderstood his grace. I believed I could live however I wanted because I had a Father who would forgive me at the end of the day. I knew nothing was too big for God, but I didn’t yet understand that, because Christ died for me, my response should be a surrendered life of obedience to him.
“In my senior year, I learned from my doctor that I had a heart condition, and I shouldn’t play basketball anymore. The thing I had invested all my energy and identity into was gone. Plans that I had for years weren’t going to pan out. I really thought God’s grace couldn’t cover this.
“I like to say that this is when God used a literal heart problem to address my real heart problem.
“As I physically recovered, my time shifted from basketball to youth group and church. What started as a place for social connection became a place where God kept me close. I didn’t always show up for the right reasons, but I was still surrounded by his people, and truth was sinking into my heart.
“Soon after high school, while interning at a local church, a friend invited me to The Porch. That’s where I experienced what an authentic, biblical community of people in my life stage looked like. Eventually, I started getting involved with Watermark’s college ministry and into a small group. I noticed that the people around me considered their faith as their way of life—they were completely changed, and their lives reflected it.
“As I grew closer to the Lord, I learned that, like Romans 6 says, I have a new life because my old life was crucified with Christ. I can—and want to—live in a way that is pleasing and honoring to him and live in complete freedom.
“Years later, after encouragement from a community director, I applied at the last minute for the Watermark Institute, a 10-month program focused on biblical training, discipleship, and hands-on ministry experience. At first, it seemed a little daunting because I hadn’t studied or been in school in a while, but it also sounded like something that fit for this season of life. To my surprise, I was accepted into the program!
“I entered the first semester of the Institute without a deep knowledge of my Bible. I now had so much time to invest in learning and understanding God’s Word and getting ministry experience. It also gave me the opportunity to continue strengthening the relationships in my life through what I was learning in Scripture. I’d have sweet relational time with my dad multiple times a week as I shared what I learned each week with him.
“Just before the second semester began in January, my dad unexpectedly passed away. He experienced a stroke and then died a week before I was supposed to return to Watermark for class in the new year.
“Driven by my perfectionist tendencies, I immediately came back to class. I didn’t want to miss anything. But this semester was much harder than the fall. My desire and struggle to please those around me resurfaced in new ways. Now, with this grief from my dad’s passing, I had little motivation to keep up with my studies.
“As the semester continued, I struggled with balancing the grief and wanting to see my time at the Institute finish excellently. The Institute staff and team gently reminded me that the goal isn’t perfection; it is to grow closer to the Lord. I was encouraged by leaders that I should use my time to know the Lord and that it was okay if it looked different than my semester before.
“I have slowly learned to do my work with the single desire to grow in intimacy with the Lord and to leave my desire for perfection behind. I wrapped up the Institute in May, and I’m grateful to be leaving with a deeper understanding of God’s Word and a closer relationship with him.
“Looking back, I see the Lord’s faithfulness and sovereignty in many ways. Even in my rebellion, he kept me close to his people. He provided believers around me in community who’ve walked with me through life’s ups and downs and who’ve encouraged me greatly as I grieve and process in this season. And he faithfully uses my wife, Olivia, to help me, point me to Christ, and remind me of his Spirit.”